Monday, April 19, 2010

That Time I Threw Up in My Coach Bag

Canada is, um, neat.

A little different at times

(for instance, what the heck is up with their stick butter? It comes in a huge mambo jambo 4 pack that is fused together. Odd)

But, for the most part, very similar to the ol US of A.

We're getting used to some different parts of being a city dweller {compared to the suburban life I've lived for the last 23 years,} such as loud neighbors, no AC, and public transportation.


Public Transportation is the bane of my existence.

Vancouver has a very good system. Sky Trains (elevated subways) run every 2-3 minutes and they are clean and well policed. The bus routes are numerous, well laid out, easy to figure out, and have very helpful drivers.

We usually have a conversation with a driver just about every day.

Even when we know what we're doing.

It ends up going something like this:

Me: Good morning!

Him: Good morning, eh!

Me: Mmm, Hmmm! (flash my bus pass,)

Me again: Thanks!

I know. Not funny. And not really a conversation.

But talking with strangers is a BIG deal for me.

Oh, right. The bane of my existence.

I can deal with the cramped quarters.

I can deal with the interesting mix of languages and cultures.

But you know what I DON'T deal well with?

That interesting mix of aromas from the variety of cultures.

That paired with the constant stop and go of a bus.

It got so bad that the other day, during our hour long commute, I REALLY thought I was going to be sick.

So, I tried to be resourceful. I mapped out my escape plan.

Sure, I might bump into that Indian man and trample on the {extremely} tiny Chinese woman, but at least I wouldn't throw up on them!

Then the bus stopped and let in another 8 people.


My escape plan was now null and void.

What would I do?

There was only one option.

Use my Coach bag as a barf bag.


Had I stooped to this?

Is this what transportation had done to me?!

Would I REALLY use that gorgeous mahogany leather bag for such a hideous moment?

What had I come to?

In the end, our stop came before I lost my lunch.{Huzzah!} I patted my bag and told her it was going to be alright, slipped on my big sunglasses and waltzed into the nearest Starbucks.

Because a girl doesn't often have such a crisis in her life and I needed something to soothe my nerves!

*Disclaimer* I apologize if you thought, from the title, that I actually would throw up in a Coach bag. Sheesh, I'm not a savage. *


Tori said...

Haha I will admit the title was misleading--but I'm glad that didn't happen!

Callie said...

I'm glad you didn't throw up in your bag! That would hav ebeen awful.

Mrs. H said...

That is hilarious! A girls gotta do what a girls gotta do:)

Chelsea said...

Our butter comes like that here too! And take it from a girl who knows a thing or two about throwing up... ALWAYS keep a plastic bag in your purse in case of emergencies. It just makes good sense!

chloƫ. said...

Wow I can't tell you how relieved I was when you didn't actually throw up in your bag! I hate puke and all things related to puke but puke on things like COACH BAGS?? *Shudders*.

Brittany said...

Bahahahaha! You better not! Hope your tummy gets used to the transportation and smell!

:) such a funny story!

Jessica said...

lol...funny! What WOULD you do in a moment like that, though? I have just recently begun getting car sick (I must be getting old! This never happened before this year!) And I often wonder "ummm, where am I gonna puke if I need to?" Sorry, that was super gross. lol

Brian and Ashley said...

That's hilarious! Thankfully you didn't need your plan OR your bag. I don't do well with funny smells either.

Kelli said...

Haha, you're funny Brits. My favorite part is the "conversation" with the bus driver. You are doing great, girl! Enjoy those smells - this too shall pass!

Emily said...

Oh, had me on that one!! I'm sooooooooo glad that you didn't use the Coach bag! I KNOW your momma and Mrs. Angela taught you better than that! Dear're a southern have put up with annoying Canadian tourists for years! Barfing on one, in their native land would've been considered one for the home team!! Just pick the most rude, hideously- fashionless one and if they already smell bad...they'll never know! I'm joking- I don't want you to start an international incident! Just carry some gallon ziplock bags in the Coach bag and try to be discreet!!!

Lauren said...

lol...I'm glad your Coach bag didn't have to suffer! I am with you on the lovely aromas...I could definitely do without them! It's the reason I hate vacationing to a big city...I'm always so glad for my small town & the fresh air!